An Introduction

BDSM. Those four letters alone mean that I have to designate this as an Adult blog. It's true that I am here to write about things that only adults should be discussing, but please do not misunderstand.

This is not a pornographic blog. I do not write erotic fiction. I am not here to discuss the racy details of my wild sex life. Sexuality will enter in to the discussion, to be sure. But that is not my primary focus here.

I'm here to explore themes of Dominance and submission in human relationships. That infamous acronym, BDSM, is an assemblage of letters with an unfortunate pedigree that, for better or worse, is intrinsically involved in this discussion.

All its variant meanings, "Bondage, Discipline and Sadomasochism," "Bondage, Dominance, Submission and Mastery," "Bondage, Discipline, Slave and Master," and many others do cover topics that I will be discussing here. However, I detest its use as an umbrella term for all manner of kinks and fetishes, ties and tortures, roles and relationships of certain persuasions. The reasons for this will hopefully be made clear in some posts to follow, though I will use the term as needed. We are, afer all, talking about things with which it is popularly associated.

But, doesn't the title of this blog say something about Christ? Indeed, it does - and I hope that is what has drawn you here. Christians all over the world are indeed involved with these things - be it through kinky sex, internet porn, unspoken fantasies, or in relationships (sexual or otherwise) with friends and co-workers.

Wherever they find expression for it, many Christians have a natural, human inclination toward Dominant/submissive play and relationships. This is healthy. This is not a sin. However, it is most often deemed to be perverted and unacceptable by Christian culture and teachings. This leads Christians to become ashamed of their inclinations and desires and to seek to fulfill them in unhealthy ways.

Wanting to give or receive spankings, to tie or be tied, to serve or be served - these are not sinful impulses and can, in fact, teach us much about a deeper Christian life and a deeper love for those around us. If you are a Christian who has these interests, this blog is for you.

You may have looked around and found other websites dealing with BDSM and Christianity. Some have condemned it, some have embraced it. I have seen them too and I've found the so-called "Biblical"arguments on both sides of the issue to be dishearteningly banal.

One side uses the Bible to repress, demean and ostracize Christians with healthy desires; the other side uses it to justify an obscene preoccupation with highly sexualized misogyny. This has gone on long enough.

I am here to offer a third way, a hopefully more balanced and realistic perspective that neither demonizes these lifestyles and desires, nor paints them as God's unbending plan for relations between the sexes. I am not a Biblical scholar, though I do take careful study of Scripture and am no stranger to the tenants of good historical scholarship, translation, exegesis and hermeneutics.

I do not claim to have it all figured out. I am still learning, as I fully expect I always will. But I am inviting you along for the journey. Perhaps we can learn from each other. My e-mail box is wide open to questions, comments and suggestions. I will be happy to respond to questions either in blog posts or in private e-mail conversations, whichever you are more comfortable with.

So, with that, I welcome you. I hope that my thoughts along the way can be helpful to you. As someone who has benefited greatly from his experiences with the Dominant/submissive dynamic, I know that it can be a rich and wonderful experience that glorifies and honors God. I hope you will find that to be true as well.